Monday, October 24, 2011

New resolve

It is a never ending battle....the struggle with weight loss. I've lost the majority of my weight (40 lbs, give or take a few) and only have about 15-20 to go to an ideal weight for me. I've been 15-20 lbs from my ideal weight for about 2 years. I lose a little and gain it back. Then lose some more and gain it all back. I've been as close as 12 lbs from my perfect weight and watched it slip through my fingers again.
I struggle. Every day I make choices, many good, but SO many are not good. Many I don't admit to people - probably not even to myself. While I exercise a ton (which saves me from gaining back all of my weight), I just don't make any progress in the long term with losing the rest of this weight.
I mentioned it last week at a bible study I'm taking with girlfriends from church. We were talking about everyone having a cross to bear and being convicted of something. I half jokingly said "I wish He'd (God) convict me about my problem with the food I keep putting in my mouth." And a friend said something to me. She said "If it's eating you up inside and it is taking your thoughts, time and energy, He already has. You're just choosing to ignore what He wants you to do." Something so simple, yet so profound.
Wednesday night I prayed. I asked for the strength to defeat my lack of self control. For the wisdom to make the correct choices for my body and for the fight to be won and the weight to finally fall away.
I woke up Thursday very much at peace. I am confortable and confident in my decisions and I know that I will be successful in losing the rest of this weight and maintaining my healthy weight.
Therefore, I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in bars, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to this life? Matthew 6:25-27

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